Beliefs Worth Doubting

When David Letterman rolls out his latest Top Ten List, our laugh meters can approach overload. Savvy preachers know this, too; the device is a great way to reign in their congregations' fretting about the week's frustrations and failures, and to help them tune in to God's better ways of handling them.

Lately, I have been working on another kind of Top Ten List, far less entertaining, but maybe at least a little bit enlightening. I am not nearly as good at this sort of thing as Letterman is, and as a lot of my preacher friends are, so I am starting slowly. What follows, therefore, is an abbreviated first draft: a Top Six List of beliefs that as a Christian you might be better off without, or at least qualifying somewhat. I'll get to the other four later, maybe.

Trust in God, and all good things will come to you. I wonder how this squares with the experiences of a lot of people who recently lost their homes to the Southern California fires. Most of them, of course, are insured, and a lot of them are pretty well off besides, so maybe God is just teaching them a lesson about conspicuous consumption --- in this case, perhaps, of land that should have remained unsettled --- without imposing a forbiddingly high net cost. As a warning, perhaps? If this sounds credible to you, call me and we can talk about a few other choice acres I would like to sell you near San Diego.

You have to forgive those who wrong you. Genuine forgiveness reflects choice, not obligation. It is something freely given, not compelled. While it is certainly better in the long run to forgive than to hold onto our grievances, letting the grievances go before we are ready to be reconciled with an offender or enemy will not help our spirituality very much. It might help to look at the issue from God's side. For instance, does he have to forgive us? Hardly. Does God choose to forgive us? In Christ, he has told us that he does. And he invites us to do likewise. But we always have the (God-given!) right to decide whether or not to accept the invitation.

The Lord is coming again, soon. If you hang loose on how soon is "soon" anyway, you can't go too far wrong on this one. Usually, though, hanging that loose is more like hanging by a thread. It has been a really, really long time since Jesus ascended into heaven, you know. Most truly spiritual people have long since been investing themselves in a lot of other godly things besides just waiting around, or sending frightening e-mails about the latest doomsday prophecy.

God helps those who help themselves. I am sure that this is partly true. Taking care of ourselves can free up the energy of people who love us to provide care for others in greater need. I seriously doubt, though, that God has no concern for what people who do help themselves are helping themselves to. (Enron execs: your day is coming, and not only in court.) The really big problem with this affirmation, though, comes with its usually unstated word, "only," as in: God helps only those who help themselves. What is most wonderful about God is that he helps those who cannot help themselves, for example, sinners like us who can never justify their existence before Him.

Jesus is our guide, example and friend. Well, to quote another friend, two out of three ain't bad. "Guide" suggests that though we still have to travel uncharted spiritual terrain ourselves, we will not have to travel it alone. "Friend" might be a bit cozy as an image for a saving relationship with God's only Son (even though Jesus himself seems to have used it) it still gets much closer to the truth than "Judge" does. "Example," though, simply will not do. Unless, by way of other kinds of examples, being celibate and being at enmity with your family is God's will for all of us.

This land is your land, this land is my land. I suppose so, although especially around Thanksgiving time I begin to get bothered all over again about how we acquired title to it and over how much conscripted labor it has taken to manage a lot of it. Indians, Africans, child laborers, legal and illegal immigrants --- in some respects there is not a whole lot of difference between them. The difference, that is, that they make to God. Sometimes it has been very hard for us as their exploiters to remember that this is their land, too. Saying this enough, and with enough conviction, just might make the cranberry sauce taste even sweeter this year.